sleep deprivation

It's midnight and I am still awake...only a few more days and this project is finito. I literally cannot wait...I might have to perform a happy dance once it is done or, alternatively, I'll on a beach in Cabo happily slurping on alcoholic beverages with little umbrellas in them while lying on a massage table. Umm yup, I'll take the latter thanks.

a two week review

Ok since work has taken over my life as I want to get this project done, blogging has fallen to the end of the priority list so for a catch up this what has been going on (don't hate me for a lame catch-up post)

• work
• flew home to attend my little brother's (who is 6'3) highschool graduation ceremonies
• surprised my entire family except THE DAD who graciously picked me up from the airport
• was shocked by the girl's choice of grad dresses (when did skanky become the new black?)
• laughed as my brother partied all weekend long and did not suffer from a hangover once
• danced with my whole family at said graduation party
• ate a pound of candy with my little sis
• met my new cousin (ok second cousin) who is absolutely adorable
• ran about six million errands in 5 days
• tried to meet up with friends
• ran out of time so had to apologize to friends (good thing they are are travelers and understand how time fills up when you arrive home for a visit)
• switched out travel attire while fighting with all our humongous tubs of clothes that are crammed into the closet in my parent's basement
• drove in crappy traffic complete with crappy Calgary weather
• paid an exorbitant amount of postage to send a package to NZ and one to Oz (Canada Post what gives?)
• saw Sex and the City---overall rating mediocre
• enjoyed a few baths...so delicious. Mexicans don't seem to into the whole bath notion so I was pretty darn excited to get in the tub at home
• Checked out my little sister's first apartment--very nice indeed
• Got our International Driver's Permits so we are legal to drive all over Central and South America!!!
  
• got back on the plane and am back in Mexico working like a demon to get the work project done

Funny that this list started out with work and ends with it...well not that funny.

That's right

Perhaps an explanation is in order for yesterday's lame post. First off believe me, I do not think I have it bad in the slightest....I just usually feel like I never have enough time to do all the things I'd like to, AND I am notorious for taking on too much stuff (just like my Dad---genetics can do weird things). So, I generally feel like I am always trying to catch up. It is a pretty crappy way to feel and an even worse way to live. And on top of that I am always worrying that I am screwing up all the time...like I won't get the job, then I do, then I am no good, then I am going to get fired....before any of this ever happens I have made myself think it will and we all know the power of thought.

So I have decided (or shall we say I am working on it) to let go of things...to stop worrying what other people think and to just decide that it will work out. Why? Because I say so MUAH HA HA! Ok I know that my "caring what others think" issue or my worrying isn't going to go away that easily but I am sure that I can correct this little niggling voice in my head bit by bit. And perhaps I will adopt the "if you don't like it then leave" attitude...yup, you heard me right BEEEOTCH!

Work and work breaks

Work has kicked in and it is taking up most of our waking hours. Don't get me wrong there are no complaints here...I am happy to get this job moving because that means we are closer to continuing on our adventure--with a bigger bank balance which is great.
I have been busy learning all the design programs and although I am no graphic designer I think I am adequate at using the programs and with T's help we are producing some good designs. It is nice to be learning as well as using creative skills that I thought 4 years of university buriedSo things are as they say, "Full on."

When we are not working I am working on learning to surf. I have my own 'tabla de surf' (surfboard in Spanish) and a wetsuit and an ability to make the most amazing wipe-outs. Truly...I am that talented....I am no longer wading in the whitewater but out with T in the bigger waves learning to stay on my board, paddle and attempt to properly catch waves. I caught one the other day and managed to stand up at the very end. Only once but it makes me want to keep going out even if it means I continue to get clobbered by waves. One day I going ride a wave even if I drink half of the ocean while trying!

working hard to not work

We managed a computer free weekend...no work and lots of play! Working on this project is harder that I think we both anticipated...it is hard to pull yourself away from work with a deadline looming and no content in sight. Working online and in Mexico is pretty awesome but maintaining our focus when there are beaches, restaurants and other fun things nearby make is difficult at times. But all I keep thinking is:

• in 2.5 months or so we will be free
• in 2.5 months we will be getting ready to immerse ourselves in Spanish
• in 2.5 months we won't be working!

one of those days...

It is 10:17am and it has already been one of those days...one of those days where you wake up feeling pretty good --things are going well and maybe you have gotten a few things right....and then WHAM! life bitch-slaps you in the face just to let you know that you've got a lot more crap to wade through and while you are reeling from the smack life whispers "it ain't easy kid...you gonna fight or give up?"

Things are good

Finally we are here, in Mexico! Things are going well and I think T and I are starting to learn how to live slower..even if we have a lot of work to do by mid-June. We did get that design job I had mentioned and after a bit of a delay, it is now full-force. I think we are both a little concerned that the deadline will come too quickly we are focussing on just putting our heads down and getting it done so we can continue our travels (with pockets a little fuller).

I am busy writing for a blog as well. It is a little harder for me which is partly due to that fact that A) I have not really been back to writing in ages B) in uni all I wrote were scientific labs (ugh) so my creative stream is a little lacking these days. But I believe I am improving and like they always say 'practice makes perfect' but I will settle for 'better' right now.

Mexico is awesome. People are friendly and the beaches are beautiful. I have only been out surfing once (and when I say surfing, I mean trying to surf) as T and I both got hit with a rather mean cold. But we are planning to try and get out a couple of times a week now that we are both feeling better and our project is moving.

Things are good.

the lady life or biatch?

so my face has recovered from when i got beaned last week. and i am feeling less guilt about quitting my job. i guess i can whine about it or suck it up and face the future which lately has been difficult for me. but i keep thinking that it has got to get better soon, so with that in my back pocket i am looking at all the options and preparing myself to make better choices when it comes to my career. the past few years have been rough but i have learned a lot about myself as well as what i like to do...which is not necessarily the same as what i am good at. but i do know that i need to have a lot of contact with people, just sitting in the same area does not work for me. also i love to be creative and the past few jobs have not let me express myself this way, although they have taught me a great deal of other important skills. so i have decided that i can be pickier with jobs, i don't have to choose the first thing that comes along. i suppose i am lucky too as T is around and working, he says he just wants me to be happy. to make things easier the two of us have some work together so i will not be a penniless mooch lying on the couch, brushing leftover chips off my ever expanding waistline, while he slaves away. actually it is pretty nice i am doing some copy changes for a client. i used to be a serious creative writer in high school but a degree in kinesiology pretty much sucked that right out of my life. so i am very nervous to be writing again but at the same time very excited. i am keeping my ear to the ground on other creative opportunities that interest me so if anyone has any suggestions on what a creative, athletic, moody, goofy, travel crazed gal should be doing let me know. to "life" bring it on biAtch.....i am ready.

bangs and small talk

so in regards to my last post things are better well...sorted out at least. i do think that i made a poor decision to open my mouth but live and learn i guess. although i feel as though i have learned this lesson time and time again.
anyway on to lighter things, like my hair. i cut straight bangs, they are longer so they are sort of in my eyes a bit but i think it was a good change. plus i think if i hate them in a month they will grow out fast. sweet.
had a work party last night, the company's one year anniversary. i am not very good at shmoozing people....you know small talk and charming everyone over. in fact it makes me really uncomfy but i did try and managed to have one really awkward conversation with a new client. it was going ok until i was out of things to say and was looking for a way to end the chat...we did the "nice talking to you" and then i started frantically looking for someone to catch my eye so that i could look like i HAD to go. no such luck so i just kind of looked like a dork. UuuuUUUUUUhhhhhhhh i really wish i was not so goofy. but then in a way i am kind of ok with not being some super charmer as i have never been big on kissing up to people and i think that is why i am bad at these type of events. it just feels so false to me.

instinct is always correct

i dont even know what to say today as things have gotten a bit out of hand. i made a crucial error at work and now i have to sort it out....not really work stuff more coworker stuff. sigh. one day i will learn to remain silent and hold my tongue but i suppose i needed this lesson. to go with your gut. i ignored mine (yet again) and now my gut is biting me in the ass. ew that is disgusting. meh at least i still have my sense of humour.